American Idol

I haven't been obsessed with this show since my girl Kelly Clarkson won 10 years ago. Since my boyfriend Steven Tyler took the judges stand, I CAN'T GET ENOUGH! Steven Tyler is ridiculous. The jelly beans that fly out of his mouth - you can't script that sh*t! Being the karaoke queen that I am, I'm highly judgemental of the contestants. I've been writing my friend Linda weekly - I figured, why not post my opinions? First on the judges - someone needs to step up and be tough. There is too much niceness happening. Speaking of nice... JLO. You are gorgeous. You are like cotton candy. You make everyone melt. Keep it up girl! SOME OLDER THOUGHTS: No person's idol should be R. Kelly. Scotty - your baritone country voice is like butta. It's so smooth, so easy. He doesn't even have to try. Niama rocking Rhianna - WORK IT GIRL! Casey - you can be my friend any day. In fact, you may be my friend Andy H. James Durbin rocks my world. Paul McDonald is a stoner playing the jambae drum around a camp fire. I want him to be my beach bum buddy. Pia - your voice is strong, but you are SO dull. Jersey is HOT right now, work it.